Between the ages of 12 about 18 I suffered with depression. It was so suffocating at times. Living with constant panic attacks and anxiety attacks. I struggled in Secondary school as I didn't know how to deal with all the anxiety that controlled my mind and body. I remember sometimes my body would be shaking with fear and worry. My mind would be going at 100mph with worries and anxieties on a loop playing round and around.
It was so hard being a pastor kid with having the expectation that you should have it all together because you believe in God, your a 'Christian' that perception that nothing bad should happen to you. I was lost I didn't know where God was, I was angry and frustrated at him. I would constantly ask Him to take all these anxieties and fears away.
I never really heard God specifically or felt Him but trusted that he was there.
I had to learn how to pursue peace in the midst of distress and turmoil. I am so grateful for my parents that they never let me have the easy way like changing school or home schooling. It has made me so strong to fight fear. To face everyday to be brave, to pursue the strength that God gives you!
God has set me free from depression it’s been a long tough battle but God fights for you! The devil only wants to KILL STEAL and DESTROY. But God has a plan for you and you have to hold on tight, trust God get that inner roar inside of you!
The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still."
God wants us to face every storm that life chucks at us to make us brave and bold! To take courage and not worry. This is why I started these positive messages on my clothing brand.
I want people to take a stand and not let the devil steal away that plan that God has for you.
I was controlled with what my mind would want to worry about but God has set me free from worry. He has taught me to trust that everyday God has got it! God can help you renew your mind.
"Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes."
Pursing his peace through a storm isn't all that easy, you have to fix your mind and watch what thoughts you are allowing in your mind. You need to be on guard. You need to take courage.
Through this long battle I know that God was with me every step of the way!
"The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged."
I will leave you with this...
God has got you even if you can't 'feel' it! He has a plan thats bigger than your wildest dreams! Take hold and run after God with all you have. The last 9 months has been unknown with my heart while I wait for a dignois but I have peace. Don't get me wrong we have feelings and emotions and its tough but you can do it I believe in you so does God.